The Master Vampire Sucks / Introduction



The Master, played by actor Mark Metcalf, was the (bald) head vampire on the WB television program Buffy the Vampire Slayer. He was pale and wrinkled and wore leather. His pseudo-futuristic black wardrobe was so ludicrous that no sensible Goth would be caught dead wearing it--although the Master could probably have arranged it.

The Master hatched many schemes, the greatest of which was his master (no pun) plan to end the world in 1937. He'd tried to exit through the "Boca de Infierno" (Hellmouth), a portal between this reality and the next, but an earthquake swallowed him up whole. Trapped behind an invisible barrier, the Master lived, tragically, and ironically, in a sunken church beneath the town of Sunnydale, California. Must have sucked to be him.

Since he could not leave his lair to do things for himself, the Master had to send out his bungling, blood-sucking minions to do his errands--stalk Buffy the Vampire Slayer, bring him victims. ALL of the Master's meals were take-out.

The Master resented the fact that he could not leave his lair. He constantly groused, spit, and whined. That is, until he finally found a way out of his hellhole....

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